Friday, July 31, 2009

Hunt For The Dark Phoenix (Friday Fiction)

This weeks Friday Fiction is hosted by Laury "Hally" Hubrich @ her blog, In My Daddy's Arms. Click here to read and share more great fiction by some awesome writers!

Author's Ramblings: Well, I'm a little too tired this week to finish the new piece I was working on, so this is a rerun. There's about seven parts to it, I believe, but the story is still a WIP. Do enjoy-Eira is a fiesty little thing with powers she's looking to develop by finding the Dark Phoenix and convincing him to take her on as a student. This is the very beginning of her journey. I'd love to know what you think, so please leave a comment. Have a wonderful weekend!

"I beg your pardon if you don't approve, sis." Eira continued stuffing-or trying to-her brown boots into an already bursting duffel. "He's the best ever and everyone knows about him-can't you think ahead to what I will be afterwards?"

"You mean besides completely insane, entirely out of sorts and struggling to function after an inevitable nervous breakdown?" Dana's sarcastic tone drew a troubled frown from her younger sibling.

"Dana-I really don't need that right now. Honest. I just wish you'd accept it instead of going all balistic like everyone else did." Eira gave up with crushing the boots and tugged them out, attempting to zipper the duffel.

"Everyone else was being nice and polite and smart!" Dana snapped, she nudged the bulky boots off the bed. "You, on the other hand, are being plain stupid."

Eira rolled her eyes. "It's plain stupid to want to develop my powers?" She snorted. "I thought you and mom were the ones always telling me I should use my powers for good and what good are they if I don't know how to use them properly and for the general good of others?"

"You're taking it out of context." Dana retorted. "And neither Mum nor I ever said anything about formal training. You're a temporary League graduate, isn't that good enough?"

"It was wonderful-and I loved it. I wish there'd been more. Besides, how could he possibly be any worse than The League? You all agreed when I said I wanted to go for temporary graduate."

Dana's eyelids lowered to near slits. "We all agreed on 'temporary'." She emphasized. "Temporary. Not a single inkling of permenance anywhere in there!"

Eira sighed, about ready to give up on both sister and duffel bag. "Look, we all have heard the saying a thousand times plus, that with power comes responsibility. Don't you want me to grow into a sensible, responsible young woman?"

"You're already responsible enough." Dana muttered. "It's the sensible part you need to master."

Eira stifled a sigh of relief as the duffel reluctantly zippered. She found a small shrinking sack to fit her boots into. Once inside, she shrunk it to the desired size and slung it over her shoulder along with the duffel. "I appreciate the worry, Sis. I guess that's what sisters do." She leaned over and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Love ya and I'll write as soon as I can, unless ya'll decide to move or something without tellin' me."

Dana was on her feet before Eira could turn towards the door. "You're leaving now? Already? What about everyone else?"

"I told everyone else when I was leaving two weeks ago." Eira said patiently, attempting to move past and stopping when Dana blocked her way. "Dana, I already said goodbye."

"And you're just going to up and leave like this?" Dana frowned. "Told your boyfriend goodbye too?"

Eira made a face. "I've already dumped him. Brent is no more supportive than you are and I wish I hadn't ever cared about him in the first place. Everything has to be done according to the way he wants it done or else. I can't stand him at all."

"A few months ago he was charming, polite and everything you could hope for." Dana hinted. "Eira, I'm only suggesting that you think of your future rather than just your present. What if you turn up there on some dingy doorstep and can't understand how you got there or why and what's going on. You'll wish there was someway to get yourself out of there and there will be no way out. You change your mind too often and your temper puts you in the worst of moods when everything doesn't go the way you want it to-I'm only asking that you consider all of this before you go on charging out into a very big and open space."

Eira sighed. "Dana-please." She held up a hand. "Don't lecture me. I'm not hearing anything you're saying right now. Look, if I get there and it isn't what I want to devote a few months of my life to, I'll turn around and come back and make up some excuse about a bossy sister, okay?"

"I'm not bossy." Dana sniffled, the first tear slowly trickling down her cheek.

Eira wished she'd left quietly a few hours earlier. "Dana, come on. Don't cry-I'll start crying and then we'll both end up looking horrible and standing in line at the farewell gate and then I'll end up on the Dark Phoenix's doorstep with tearstreaks all over my face."

"I can't help it!" Dana swiped at her face, but the tears were still coming. "Eira, they don't call him the Dark Phoenix for nothing."

"And we all know that my powers are a little too dark for my own good." Eira patted her shoulder awkwardly. "I'll write as soon as I can, Dana. You know me."

Dana took a deep breath, followed with a loud sniffle. "I do, unfortunately." She smiled through the last tears. "Take care of yourself, you hear? And don't you bring back anything less than your best!"

Eira grinned. "My best or else? I think I can handle that." She gave a last hug before charging out the door and down the hall to the back door. She skidded to a stop at hearing voices in the kitchen.

There wasn't supposed to be anyone else home. At least not now. She pantomimed smacking her forehead. How stupid of her to think that she could simply sneak out after an announcement two weeks before and no one even paying some attention. Naturally they would appear not to-if they meant to throw her an extravagant farewell party.

A hand touched her shoulder and Eira flinched, turning to see a mildly amused Dana. Her sister gestured towards the kitchen hall, but Eira shook her head lightly. Dana's head bowed for a moment and then she motioned towards the front door and blew a kiss.

Eira pretended to catch it and tip-toed quietly, successfully to and out the door. She didn't glance back, not wanting to see her sister's tear-streaking complexion a third time. "I'll be fine, Dana." She murmured. "And someday we'll laugh over this." She struggled to join the flow of the passing crowd. "We'd better." She added grimly, checking the time on her travel stub. She was cutting things pretty close.

© Sara Harricharan


Lynda S. said...

Hmmmm, more please!

Lynn Squire said...

Just like sisters. :) Looking forward to more.

Laury said...

Okay, Sawa dear - we're all ready for the second part. Guess what! We'll be meeting face-to-face a week from today! Woohoo! yay!

Hoomi said...

Finally got a few minutes to try and catch up. Now, off to part II!

J.H. said...

+Hi Sara! Don't mind me just yet, I'm one of your hidden followers; hidden because my site isn't much right now. Every time I come here I ask, 'when am I going to open up and leave some comments on any of this girl's millions of web postings?' After beginning "Dark Phoenix", I've declared today the day!
+Well, here's what I think so far.
Impressions: Immediate. The dialogue hooked me the first minute of reading. After Eira shrinks the bag to fit on her shoulder I'm wanting some description about her world, but that's fine at this point because first, I know it's coming, and second, the dialogue was dramatic.
Edit: Paragraph 11 "Once instead, she shrunk..." I think you mean "Once 'inside', she shrunk...".

Sara Harricharan @ Fiction Fusion said...

Hi J.H.! Thanks for taking the time to read the first installment of the Dark Phoenix. This story certainly has a mind of its own, and I've had so much fun writing it! I've fixed the typo--thanks for letting me know. I often do not edit these pieces and sometimes I miss the really obvious mistakes. LOL. Thanks again--enjoy the read! ^_^